ramble on, maestro

Sometimes just for fun I uber-stalk my ex-boyfriends and guys I’ve hooked up with. It’s hilarious.

It’s not so hilarious when I remember that I’ve hooked up with them.

When everyone is just in love someone but you can instantly see through their bullshit.

You’re just looking at them like:

I need y’all’s help. Help me figure out how to break up with someone.

I’ve been dating this guy. It’s one of my really good friend’s older brothers. She was so excited to set us up that I said yes. The brother is literally so sweet and nice, but not my type. He’s just very quiet and I feel like I have to drive the conversation. I have fun, but I’m not attracted and I just feel uncomfortable and awkward for most of the time. My friend texted me and she said that if I don’t like him then I need to end it because leading him on is worse and rude. I completely agree but I don’t know what to say. I don’t think I want a boyfriend. I don’t want to sound cheesy and be like, “it’s not you, it’s me” but it really is me. He’s done nothing wrong.

So what do I say? Help me out, guys. Please.

So freaking adorable.

So freaking adorable.

(Source: weheartit.com)

All I want is someone to cuddle with right now.

So today I found out JT likes me. Which is a nice feeling, I suppose. Definitely flattering. But it would have been better timing if this happened last year when I still liked him.

Now I just feel suffocated by all of his texts, phone calls, bear hugs. He is everything I want in a guy. Charming, sweet, good looking, athletic, talented, creative and funny, but I don’t want any of it right now. I’m leaving in less than a month and so is he. Six hours apart. I don’t want this right now. I can’t have any of this in my life. It is already too stressful as it is.

But deep down I know this is probably another way for me to run away from commitment.

Alright here we go!

1) Current Facebook picture:

2) Picture of myself a year ago:

This is from almost exactly a year ago after I got pied in the face with Jess and Zach.

3) A picture that makes you smile:

This is me and my best friend Kara at prom. I found my prom dress about a month and a half before prom. Kara found hers about a week before. Different stores. Different brands. We didn’t really talk about what they looked like but we still ended up with the exact same dress. :)

4) A picture from when you were little:

Living the thug life since 1993.

5) A picture with someone you love:

Me and my sister back during the Olympic in 1996. She’s in England right now and I miss her like crazy.

6) A picture with you and friends:

This is from the Thespian Awards with all of the seniors from school and some of my closest friends.

7) A picture of you with your family:

This was about a month ago at Baccalaureate.

8) A picture that your hair looks nice:

It’s not neat, but I really like my hair here. Ignore the rash on my neck, it’s stage makeup I had for a show. :)

9) A picture of me and your pets:

Lily and I after graduation. My dog is not photogenic, but she is very adorable in person. :)

10) A picture of you hugging someone:

Me hugging Chase after announcing he won Best Actor at the Thespian Awards night. Giving the best award to my best friend. We were both crying. It was a beautiful moment.

11) A picture of you and your best friend:

I have a number of best friends so it’s hard to pick one person, but I love this picture. It’s Will and I during my graduation party. I love him so much.

12) A picture of you today:

13) A picture of something you miss:

The other week, I feel in love with a camper of mine. His name was Leaf Brown (his parents were the hugest cutest hippies ever). So in school whenever a person would call attendance, they would call “Brown, Leaf”. He was the most adorable, kindest, sweetest, beautiful boy I have ever seen in my entire life. I’ve been going through Leaf withdrawal.

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Lesley. 21.
I like queso dip, fast cars, breathing, and The Beatles.

I do not take credit for any photos on here unless stated otherwise.

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